He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
