this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
