Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I believe in your delicious
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize