I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
