bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
She said her name was "party"
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
