I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
