dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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