I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
