awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Randomize