He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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