i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize
