Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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