it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
