Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize