dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
