I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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