I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
