She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
