Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
