they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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