You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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