I'm drive I can fine osifer
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I wish i was in the wii world.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize