This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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