I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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