Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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