my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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