i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Randomize
