he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
