i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
