I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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