just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
