I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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