And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
