He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
just tell him i said nine months
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Never joke about your clitoris.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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