i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
be right there i have to get my cape
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I love you. Go after that dick
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
