that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
