Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
