Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
