I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize