Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
