So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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