i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
