She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
