Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
