THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
