hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
