I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
