dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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