My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm really busy with my period
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