You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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