My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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