We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
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